January 11, 2012

The Year is 2012.

- You still cannot proclaim “FAIL” in regards to anything ever. No exceptions. (*repeat rule from 2008, 2009, 2010, and 2011.)

- Should you still violate this rule, if you put the word “EPIC” anywhere near it, I will smash you to death between two Pontiac Aztecs.

- Nyan cat? You’re uninvited to my wedding. (Brides not exempt.)

- Sad Keanu? Dead friend.

- Oh you think the Hangover is hilarious? I’m locking you in a Walmart with every obese person in Kentucky. Good luck.